Chapter 36: I Have Been So Blind

Reinier pulls himself up to a sitting position, his head throbbing from being thrown down to the floor. "Sterren," he murmurs, worried she might be hurt by the fall. But no, he realizes as he looks in her direction. The ...creature...obviously not human, who appeared to disrupt his wedding so violently now kneels before Sterren, taking her hand to help her up. Whatever he'd done to Reinier and his men, Sterren was untouched. 

With the same flash of light that accompanied his appearance, the strange creature disappears, taking Sterren with him.

Father Loyset, thrown back against the altar, groans, and Reinier helps him to his feet, while his men also rise. None of them were seriously injured by their falls.

"That woman is witch, my lord!" the old priest exclaims,  "A practitioner of the black arts! She summoned a demon. Here, in this sacred place! You must not think of marrying such an unholy creature. She is an abomination, and must be destroyed!"  The priest finds his courage now, when Sterren is gone and Reinier cannot force him at sword point to perform the marriage rite.

"I knew she had a gift for healing, but I never thought her to be a witch," Reinier muses, growing thoughtful as he re-examines every conversation he'd had with Sterren in the short time he'd known her.

"She's ensorcelled you with her magic," the priest says, "Seduced you to gain influence with you..."

That possibility had crossed Reinier's mind. After she'd bandaged his wounds, he spent days thinking of nothing but her, and his subsequent visit to Avendale was more about meeting her again than his avowed purpose of hunting dragons. And when he did see her again, he threw himself at her feet and offered her his hand in marriage. And that's where the love spell theory begins to unwind. She took him to her bed, but she never wanted to be his wife, fighting against that even here in the church where he would have wed her, and resorting to summoning one of the Old Ones, ancient demons the people in these parts call 'the fair folk', inhuman, magic wielding beings who existed before the birth of mankind, both worshipped and feared by the ignorant and superstitious, before the grace of the Watcher enlightened them, to rescue her.

So, if not the power and influence that would come from being his wife, what did she want from him?

Reinier turns to Anselm, the knight who's been with his brother the night he was attacked. "You said the creature that struck you down had, pale, odd colored skin, pointed ears, and his face was marked with designs, " he says, rubbing his chin, "Was it the same creature as appeared here today?"

"No, my lord," Anselm answers, "This one was nothing like the other."

When he'd captured the wilder, a dragon came after him. The night the captive was rescued, his brother was assassinated by a wilder woman and one of these fair folk. 'You'll never kill another dragon' was what the wilder said to Deidericx as she sunk his knife into him. Reinier had sensed some connection between the wilders and the dragons, and now apparently the fair folk were involved as well. He remembers Sterren's reaction to his captive wilder, her demand that he free his prisoner. She followed him to Odet then, he had vainly thought in pursuit of his affections. But on the night she arrived, his prisoner was set free, and his brother murdered, mistaken for himself. He'd been in Sterren's bed that night, and cannot directly tie her to these events. But still, her association with the fair folk, her use of magic, her sympathy for the wilder...it all points to the possibility that he'd been her dupe the entire time.

Sterren had barely gotten to her feet when her rescuer suddenly transported them both back to the Lady's sacred grove in Avendale, and as they arrived, she lost her balance and fell softly into the grass. He reaches a hand out to her, and once again, helps her to her feet.

Until very recently, Moth was the only example of the fair folk Sterren had seen. Meeting Ico had given her a new perspective on what their kind might be like. Whatever image she might have formed of them is shattered as she stands face to face with her savior. "You...you are him, aren't you?" she gasps in reverent awe, glancing at the statue of the Lady beside them.

Auberon smiles slightly. He knows the mortals' stories, and the role he plays in them, so he does not have to ask Sterren who she means by 'him'. There is only one 'him' she could be referring to. "I am," he says, and then has to stop her from dropping to her knees before him, "That is not necessary, daughter," he says, "You are safe here?"

Sterren nods, trying to find words, anything to say to this prince of the fair folk, consort of the Lady herself.

"Then I will go," he says, "I have seen already by too many of your kind."

"May I---may I ask your name?" Sterren manages to get out before he disappears again.

"I am Auberon," he says, and then is gone.

She walks home, numb, seeing nothing, hearing nothing, just walking, to get to her house her bed. Once she's there, she breaks, curling around herself, alone her bed, crying.  The whole day and night is spent in sorrowful lament, crying as she thinks of his touch, the sweet words he'd whispered to her, all lies. In the morning, hough she'd eaten nothing since her last breakfast with Reinier, she retches up everything inside her, as though her body wishes to purge him from her.

She must go to her uncle, she thinks, steeling herself as she dresses, he'll want to know she's home. And she'll have to tell him...what? How much of this sorry tale does Marrec need to know? Her hard won composure breaks and Sterren falls to the floor, weak, crying. She will have to see her uncle, as Lord of Avendale, he'll need to be informed of the happenings in Odet, but she's not ready to face his disappointment in her. He wanted a marriage, an alliance with the Landgraab family, and she not only refused, but mat have made them enemies instead. In this state, crumbling into tears at just the thought of Reinier's smile, she cannot muster the strength to defend her actions. What she needs is someone she can confide in without judgment, a friend who had nothing invested in her possible union with Reinier. Sterren gets up, washes the tears from her face once again, and takes the road leading to Taran Madec's farm.

Taran listens to her tale, how she set out to rescue the dragon slayer's wilder prisoner, with the aid of the fair folk, ad all that happened in Odet. "And then, when he dragged me into the church of his Watcher, meaning to force me into marriage with him, I saw that I had never really known him at all. I thought I was in love with him, but I never knew what he was, never believed..."

"How could I have been so blind?" she sobs, falling into Taran's arms, "How could I fall in love with such a man?"

"It's in your nature to see the best in people," Taran whispers, holding her as she sobs into his chest, "When we last spoke of him, you had your doubts about him. Your were not blind to his faults, you just gave in to the hope that his better nature would overcome them. I am sorry, so sorry, that he hurt you, but I would not see you change, become bitter, or afraid to love. If he has damaged your spirit..." Taran cannot continue, because a peasant like himself poses no threat to a great lord, and he can do nothing with the anger that burns inside him, the desire to strike out against the man that had the love of a woman like Sterren and abused it.

Taran's sympathy and the warmth of his embrace, brings her more comfort than his words, and her tears for the moment abate. But even as she begins to find her strength again, another wave of nausea crashes over her. She groans as she turns away, clutching her roiling stomach.

"Sterren?" Taran calls to her gently.

She rushes out of his arms, out of his house, and heaves violently into the bushes. As a healer, she knows the ways of the body, and while there is a poetry in thinking hers is trying to rid itself of the poison of Reinier's false love,  she knows better than to believe it.

Taran follows her, concerned. He's no healer, but he's a father, and has seen these signs before, when his wife was pregnant. "Are you with child?" he asks in a whisper. It would be a terribly personal question, one he would never broach with any other woman.

Sterren breaks into sobs again as she falls onto a nearby bench. Taran is right, she's with child, there is no doubt. "What am I to do?" she cries, "He can't know, can't know this child is his."

"You'll need another man to claim paternity," Taran says.

Sterren thinks of Gaelle and how she's duped Treveur Brannon into believing she carries his child. "I would not be capable of such deceit," she murmurs, thinking out loud.

"I know the child is not mine, but I would be its father, Steren," Taran says, his voice quiet and grave.

"Oh," she gasps, realizing what he's offering to do for her, "I couldn't ask this of you, to raise another man's child."

"You aren't asking it of me, Sterren," Taran says, taking her hand, "I am offering you what help I can give you."

"You are truly the best friend I could have," Sterren says, managing a smile behind her tears, "But you cannot take this burden on yourself."

"What burden, Sterren? Your child needs a father, and my daughter needs a mother. My burden has been raising her on my own. I would not marry just any woman to take that role, but Elara adores you, and we have long been friends. You need me, and I am here for you."

"And do you think the people will believe I carry your child? I know my aunt put out the word that she expected a marriage between myself and Reinier. It may be that people will suspect the truth even if we did arrange a hasty marriage."

"Before the dragon slayer ever set foot in this village, there was gossip about you and me, Sterren. The widow Cariou actually demanded once that I make an honest woman of you."

Sterren giggles at the mental image of the old woman poking her bony finger at Taran. "Truly? Where do they get such ideas?"

"They see a man and a woman spending time together, and that's all they need to spread gossip. So, yes, a hasty marriage between us, followed quickly by the birth of a child, will be believed by the village without question. You being pregnant with my child could even be the reason the expected alliance with the Landgraab fell apart."

Sterren nods, seeing the wisdom in his plan. "Thank you, Taran," she sighs, glad of his friendship and the affection they share, "I am lucky to have you."